I'mma Square

This poem is usually spoken only, but I want to share it. I wrote this while living in Los Angeles attending a drama school where the populous of straight men was dense. Then I thought to myself, "Self, there was no boyfriend before LA, so it must be something else..."

I'mma Square

by Lisa B.

My heart and soul are perpendicular

They often meet up and talk to each other

Right now, they tryna help me find a brotha

I always get dumped and clumped into the friends category

I’ve been invited in sharing too many NBA stories

I am one click a away from E-Harmony

So I decided to write a dating profile summary

It reads...

For 90º days I like to sit in the shade but I like my dudes darkskinneded

But I’ll go for the lightskinneded, hell at this point I’ll hook with a Palestinian who hates Americans

Legit

Romance went on a haitus

Va-whomp whomp in hibernation

My check list keep diminishin

Narrowed down to two

Be a straight

No Egos

I need a man that can take a woman that’s devoted to her business

Yeah I independently pay my bills but on a dude I’ll still depend

But it Depends

I often check out what’s in your pants to make sure leaks of arrogance isn’t trickling down your legs

So excuse me if I’m staring

I’m not checkin for your inches

I’m checkin to see if you are an ego ho

A ego is to me

What a Leo is to a Pisces

I am the real

Legit-I-mate rhymes with mics that give birth to lyrical clauses that gain applauses

But I no care if no one gives me a round

I’mma square

The angle of my hair always right

Ready to square off at any mic

You boast about hood rhymin crew

I’m from GI

We make your inner city circles look like Urkels

Wanna get even Steve?

Then step into my precious

Where I am Lord of the Squares

Trilgogy

This is The Return of the Queen MC’s

And I ain’t talking ‘bout no Nikkie

Oh of this you can be sure

I no-lye like relaxers

I keep it 10²

Truth commercials?

Nicotine?

Smoke me

I’ll make you look real cool

I’mma square

You know, the kind that’s into science

E=MC²

I Energize the Crowds by the Masses

And that is the side of me that the boys can’t handle

Won’t fondle

It’s like I stole they girl

They hate how I one night mic stands

Leave no money on the table

By the way I present

It’s obvious

I use to love H.E.R.

No Homo

But don’t you test me

I will stroke that mic so hard and hand you back your testes

I’m fearless without the balls

How about you grow a pair

Grow a face and some hair

For that ego

Before what’s left of your brain grows a pair of legs and runs away forever

How about you go away?

You fall prey to my bait

Tweets and status updates

Well here’s some honesty box for you

You’re to cool for me

To busy chasing hoes and money

But

S-Q-U-A-R-E spells American Cheese

And I get it, no gimicks

Hickory

You may need to pop a round on to keep up with me

Wanna play four corners?

Take it to the fourth quarter?

Dickory dock shot clock diminishing

Game, I win

Wanna run it back?

Trust me

You don’t want a rematch homie

That’s when I take you to the land of 3d

Where every one would wanna be a square just like me

Lisa B.

http://www.liftedsoul.com/

www.youtube.com/lisabpoetry

http://www.speakintothemic.com/

Allow Me To Re-Introduce Myself...

Why wasn’t that just rude of me? I never considered the followers and continuous readers of the CB Publishing blog when I just up and started posting entries without the formal, “Hi, my name is...” I was so caught up in The Game season premiere last Tuesday, that I encroached on this blog’s territory. Well, in all honesty I am not exactly sorry, but this entry is just an excuse for me to take part in one of my favorite past times: writing about myself. Below is the excerpt from the autobiography that I am currently drafting with the working title, AWE: Amazingly Wonderfully Excellent: The True Documented Accounts of the Great Lisa B: Inside the Inside Story

....On a bright June 12, 1980-something day, the world got a little brighter around 6:30/5:30central as a new vibration of sound hit the ether causing a centrifugal force to spread throughout the atmospheric space. And yes, I did not look up any of those words to back up the validity of that sentence. Anyway, it is said that someone may have possibly not quite but maybe saw God’s teardrop fall into Lake Michigan causing the water to overwhelmingly tide over the shoreline of Gary, IN. His best work yet was being delivered not to far away at Methodist Hospital. After 3 seconds of painless labor, God’s bundle of grace was handed over to the joyous first time mother. Well, the mother actually had two other children, beforehand, but after cradling this angel, “the last shall be first” made sense to her. It is also recorded, but not really written down, that when the nurse smacked the baby’s bottom to hear the first cry as a sign of oxygen hitting the lungs, there came no sound. Instead the baby pointed to a nearby pen and pad. The nurse handed it to the Gift from God and to everyone’s amazement, watched the child write down, “Waaahh Waaaahhh Wah!” while humming Journey’s Don’t Stop Believing. Then the finger of that same small baby reached up to wipe away the lone tear that slowly trickled down the face of her mother. “Shhhh,” the baby comforted, “I’m here now. Everything will be alright.” The mother named the baby girl Queen Elizabeth Beasley. However, the same nurse who recorded the baby’s first authorial moment, misplaced the birth certificate and the child was hereby known by her nickname, Lisa B...

I know you’re dying to read the rest of my autobiography. For now, I’ll tell you all you need to know and the rest can be found on my facebook page. I write, act, sing, and dance. I’m a professional performer, spoken word artist, graphic designer, and lover of Jazz History which I believe tells the story of America. I’m in every relational position that a woman can be in, except wife, mother, and/or mistress. I started a company called Lifted Soul, INC in 2009 and so far, so great. I hope you check back often to read my factually based opinions.

Also, I’ll keep you posted on the autobiography that I am currently drafting with the working title, AWE: Amazingly Wonderfully Excellent: The True Documented Accounts of the Great Lisa B: Inside the Inside Story

Here are a few of the critiques I’ve gotten:

Trust me, you’re not gonna wanna put down this Almost but not really kinda sorta true story down. 5.6 stars.

-Nu Yurk Times

I’m turning into a movie.

-The Guy Who Made Avatar.

Lisa B.

www.liftedsoul.com

www.youtube.com/lisabpoetry

www.thegamerecap.blogspot.com